Are you stress resistant?

No, I shatter under pressure.

Is overtime okay?

No, I always vanish at five like a ghost.

Are you creative?

No, country C is my muse.

Can you multitask?

No, one thing at a time.

Passionate about work?

Nope, paycheck is my passion.

Want a full-time role?

No, I'm here for the free coffee.

For real?

Just kidding, please hire me.